Chayei Sarah: The Necessity of Righteous Women

The Torah parasha, or portion, of Chayei Sarah commences, somewhat ironically, with the death of Abraham’s wife.  Sarah’s lifetime came to the ripe old age of 127; she died in Kiryat-Arba near Hebron.  Abraham approached the resident Hittites to purchase a burial site.  After a traditional process of price discussion, Abraham ultimately bought the cave of Machpelah from Ephron for the lofty sum of four hundred shekels of silver.  The field of Machpelah along with the cave in the area of Hebron passed ownership from the Hittites to Abraham, and he buried Sarah there.

Abraham was now elderly and greatly blessed.  He made his servant swear an oath that he would locate a wife for his son, Isaac, with the stipulation that she be from Abraham’s homeland and not from among the Canaanites.  Under no circumstances would Isaac travel back to Abraham’s homeland; rather, she would be brought to Isaac.

The servant departed with ten camels and a large quantity of bounty towards Aram-naharaim, the city of Abraham’s brother, Nahor.  Arriving at the well, the servant prayed that the Most High would show him who should be Isaac’s bride.  He asked that the right woman respond to a request for a drink by also offering to give water to the servant’s ten camels.

He had barely finished his prayer when a beautiful and pure young woman approached.  The servant asked her for a drink of water; she immediately complied, and offered to draw water from the well for his camels as well.  The servant gave her jewelry as a reward, and inquired who she was.  She informed him that she was the granddaughter of Nahor, Abraham’s brother.  She further invited the servant to lodge at her home with her family.  Rebekah’s brother, Laban, saw the gifts of jewelry given to her, and enthusiastically reiterated the offer of hospitality.

When food was set before the servant, he refused to eat until he had explained his task from Abraham.  He recounted the oath Abraham compelled him to swear, as well as his prayer at the well and the kind actions of Rebekah.  Bethuel and Laban, Rebekah’s father and brother respectively, agreed to allow Rebekah to marry Isaac.  The next morning, the servant requested to depart immediately.  The family initially protested, but they ultimately allowed Rebekah to decide.  She agreed to leave at once, and she departed with her nurse and her maids.  

Isaac was contemplatively praying at the time of the evening.  Rebekah saw Isaac and rapidly dismounted, asking who the man was.  The servant replied, “That is my master, Isaac.”  Rebekah covered herself with a veil.

Isaac and Rebekah were married.  Isaac loved her, and he found comfort after his mother’s death.

Abraham took another wife named Keturah.  She bore additional sons to Abraham, including Midian.  Abraham willed all that he owned to Isaac, but he gave gifts to the sons of Keturah.

Abraham lived to a total age of 175 years.  Isaac and Ishmael buried him in the cave of Machpelah where Sarah had been buried.  Isaac was further blessed and lived near Beer-lahoi-roi.  

The line of Ishmael, the son of Hagar, is described.  He died at the age of 137.

When Sarah passed away, Abraham bought the cave of Machpelah and the surrounding land from the Hittites at an exorbitant price.  With the exception of Rachel, all of the patriarchs and matriarchs are buried here.  But why was it so necessary to purchase the land from the current residents without even trying to negotiate the price to a lower cost?  And why didn’t Abraham simply bury Sarah in the land that he presently occupied?

There are a number of ideas about the purchase of Machpelah.  One comment is that any kind of downward negotiation in price might have implied that Sarah wasn’t “worth” the full price of the land.  In other words, if the land cost four hundred silver shekels, and Abraham countered with two hundred silver shekels, then some might construe that Abraham had placed a limit on what his wife was “worth.”  In contrast, however, Abraham immediately agreed to even the most outrageous price.  In other words, Abraham essentially declared that memorializing the life of his wife and doing a final act of kindness for her was far more important to him than any amount of money.

Another thought is that Abraham had already been made aware that his descendants would be oppressed and enslaved in a foreign land, but they would ultimately return to the land of Israel.  In that context, Abraham could have been fearful that the final remains of Sarah (and later the other patriarchs and matriarchs) would be disturbed or discarded on the basis that Abraham and his descendants supposedly didn’t have a proper claim to the land.  However, by making a fully-recorded public purchase for such an exorbitant amount of money, there could be no possible question that Abraham and his descendants did in fact own the cave of Machpelah and the surrounding land where Sarah was buried.  Thus, it is possible that Abraham was also acting in the mindset of ensuring that at least this segment of the land of Israel would always remain with his descendants, the Jewish people, for perpetuity, regardless of our current conditions or status.

Site of the Cave of Machpelah in Hebron

One aspect of Chayei Sarah that is interesting to note is the prayer of the servant, generally identified as Eliezer, that would enable him to determine who Isaac’s bride should be.  On the surface, it almost seems as though Eliezer demanded an omen of the Almighty.  The request of such Divine “signs” and “omens” is usually frowned upon by our chachamim, or rabbinical sages of blessed memory.  And Rabbi Moshe ben Maimon, or the Rambam, outright prohibits such actions.  But in that case why was Eliezer’s seeming “omen request” granted and even blessed?

Based at least partially on the thoughts of Rabbi Shlomo Yitzhaki, or Rashi, one opinion is that the request of Eliezer is not an omen; rather, it is a test of Rebekah’s character.  In other words, if Eliezer had prayed, “Let the woman who is to be Isaac’s wife wear a blue outfit instead of red,” that would have been an inappropriate (and presumably asur, or prohibited, omen).  But what Eliezer really prayed in effect was, “Let me find a woman who abounds in kindness and generosity.”  Eliezer, having been a witness to and collaborator with the immense hospitality of Abraham and Sarah, knew what kind of woman Isaac needed to marry.  Further, since Sarah had recently passed away, only a woman matching Sarah in her generous kindness would be worthy of Isaac and a positive and welcome addition to the household of Abraham.  Accordingly, Eliezer didn’t make an inappropriate demand of the Most High.  Instead, he knew that only a woman similar to Sarah in kindness, generosity, and quality of character would voluntarily offer to give water to ten thirsty camels when a stranger merely asked for a drink of water for himself.   

Another defining characteristic of Sarah’s life was her immense modesty.  For instance, in Bereshit (Genesis) 18 we read that when three male visitors approached, she remained in her tent.  Similarly, as soon as Rebekah saw Isaac, she covered herself with her veil.  Thus, we see that Rebekah paralleled her mother-in-law of blessed memory in kindness, generosity, and modesty.

While much focus is placed on various male figures in the Torah and Tanakh, the importance of righteous women in our Jewish history is also paramount.  For instance, according to Halachah, or Jewish law, the determining factor of Jewish heritage is inherited from the mother rather than the father.  From the very beginning during the lifetime of Abraham and beyond, we see that the mother’s side determined the Jewish lineage.  Abraham had multiple sons with three women, including Ishmael and Midian.  However, only Isaac, the son of Sarah, was the continuation of the Jewish people.  Isaac and Rebekah had two sons.  Jacob married four women from among Abraham’s relatives; Esau married unscrupulous Canaanite and Ishmaelite women.  Only Jacob’s children were part of the Jewish people.

This is the concept that Abraham emphasized to his servant, ostensibly Eliezer, as he instructed him in regards to finding a suitable wife for Isaac.  Abraham knew that Sarah, his life partner and soulmate, was crucial to his own success, spiritually and otherwise.  Abraham was painfully aware that it was imperative for Isaac to marry a righteous woman of his own extended household in order to begin the Jewish people.  The core identity of the Jewish people from the days of Abraham to present times is the establishment of a Jewish home adhering to the “ways of the Almighty.”  Accordingly, the Sh’ma prayer based on Devarim (Deuteronomy) 6 emphasizes the importance of building a Jewish home defined by observance of the Torah.  If Isaac were to marry an unrighteous Canaanite or other woman of questionable character, foreigner or otherwise, then the Jewish people would have ended before we even began.May the Holy One, Blessed be He, grant us long lives filled with acts of kindness and generosity in the same manner as Sarah Imanu, our mother.  And may we appreciate each and every day of the immense value and utter necessity of righteous Jewish women for the establishment and maintenance of our homes and communities, and for the ultimate, ongoing survival of the Jewish people.